“She thought about you a lot, even at the end. How classy.īut Adam stepped a little nearer. About your mom.” My throat tightened so much I had to force the last word out, like a grunt. But it was up to you to decide if you wanted to write back or let us in.” She said I could send a letter now and then, so you’d know I hadn’t forgotten. At some point, Mom said we had to respect your choices. “Of course there was a point!” In the little bear-tummy mirror, I saw Adam run a hand over his close-cut hair. Adam and his mom, even his brother and dad- they were special. “No point.” I hadn’t wanted what happened after I was arrested to touch them. They always said you didn’t want to see us, wouldn’t take our letters.” I know Mom tried too, right from the beginning. “After I woke up in the hospital and got to where I could think about things besides the broken bones, I tried to get in touch with you. “You know she- she’s not with us anymore?” His voice had gone rough. “Sounds like something your mom would have said.” “I’d have come-” He stopped, cleared his throat. Now I was all about making it through by whatever worked. My pride went, somewhere in that long, hard first year.
“Saved a little money.” Mostly by squatting rather than paying rent, eating at free kitchens. Me, a couple of illegal aliens, and a guy who was usually stoned. Found one after a while.” Crappy job, cleaning public bathrooms.
I didn’t want anyone to see me walk out those prison gates an ex-con. After a moment he said, “When did you get out?” I could see a warped view of Adam, half his face, looking at me, his gaze steady but his lips pressed together uncertainly. There was a big teddy underneath it with this round little mirror on its stomach. He paused, like he was deciding what was safe to ask a wild man like me. I’ve missed you so fucking much!”Īdam was always braver than me. First time I saw him in years, and I about punched him. I dropped my fist and whirled away to hide the water in my eyes. “Sorry! God, Donnie, I’m really sorry, just don’t go yet. Adam flinched back, his empty palms held out. Fast as a snake, I hit his grip off my arm, harder than I meant to, my other fist coming up.
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